Anxious rambling...

Got a bit of free floating anxiety today. I haven’t heard anything from my Trustee for over a week and that’s making me nervous for some reason.

I guess a contributing factor might be that my ex sister in law is giving me a hard time on Facebook. I’m wondering if I should un-friend her. She keeps posting snide remarks on my photos. Things like: “Looks like you’re having loads of fun… lucky u…”

What am I supposed to do?

Unfortunately, I can see her point. Her brother is the ex partner from my very first post. That is to say he is the beginning, middle and end of all my financial woes. His failed business idea was the beneficiary of the loans that crippled me and forced me to declare bankruptcy in the first place. Unfortunate for me, unfortunate for his sister; he also persuaded her and her husband to mortgage their house for his stupid business idea. My ex is supposed to be making the mortgage payments but he keeps missing them and blaming me because I’ve run off and left him to manage everything.

The biggest problem is that I do feel incredibly guilty about my bankruptcy. It wouldn’t be so bad except that I know the other creditors personally. I couldn’t give two nits about the banks, they still made a profit from me with interest and fees, but these are people have put in money they earned themselves, they have real assets on the line, their homes and retirement money. How can I justify abandoning them?

I just don’t want to deal with it anymore. I just want to leave it in the past and forget it ever happened. Surely bankruptcy is the ultimate financial sacrifice? Surely that exonerates me from any further responsibility? That’s what it is for! So why do I feel so bad then?